| As far back as my
memory takes me, I remember being adopted. Although it was rarely spoken
of in our home, adoption was with me in every aspect of my life, from every
decision I made, to every time I passed a mirror and saw that unfamiliar
face looking back at me. And as much as my family tried to avoid my adoptee
status and help me to feel as "normal" as possible, I needed to know who
I was and where I came from.
I grew up as an only child, loved and cared for by my overprotective parents. They gave me all the love and support a child could ask for, and never once referred to me as their "adopted" daughter. They did the best they could, but expected me to be just like them, while I was struggling inside with my own identity. When I gathered enough courage, I asked for any information they had on my birth parents. That is when I learned they didn't even have a single clue. I had always felt the necessity to search for my biological families. That didn't mean I loved my parents and family any less, just that I needed to know my own background. Knowing where I came from wouldn't take away who my parents are. They always made me their first priority in life and I have an overabundance of love and respect for them as well. It was entirely for my own sanity, and I didn't think they would understand my desire to know. I attended my first Triple Hearts meeting in January of 1996 after being aware of the group for almost 2 years. I was guided in the direction of how to search and did so. Less than a month and a half later, I had the name and address of my birth mother in my trembling hands. Two days of laughing, crying and disbelief passed before I sat down to make the most important call of my life, the call that has changed my life. I had no idea what to expect, but I knew I would accept whatever happened. Just the satisfaction that I had tried was enough. What I found was
a greater understanding of myself, along with the confidence I had lacked
in the past, not to mention a wonderful birth mother, two sisters and a
brother I had always longed for. Since that day I have also met much of
my extended family and have built solid, lasting relationships. My parents
have met both my birth mother and birth father, and have been overjoyed
of our reunion. The past 3 years have been an unbelievable experience full
of ups and downs, but given the opportunity, I would never change a thing!
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| Contributed
by
January, 1999 |
Tammy
Hemet, CA Adoptee Reunited 3-12-96 |